An easy 15 step guide to getting over a tough situation
selfcare tips

How To Get Over A Bad Situation(15 Tested and Trusted Steps).

I’m pretty sure it’s safe to say that we’ve all gone through a bad situation in life(it could be rejection from a crush, betrayal from a close friend, a messy breakup, abuse or bullying and harassment either at school,work or anywhere at all)that leaves us feeling sad and heartbroken or with major trust issues,a bruised ego and a damaged self confidence,and even though we are well aware of the fact that life can’t always be rosy;it doesn’t really do much to lift our moods when things get a little bit tough for us.

Even though we’d wish it to be otherwise,life isn’t always going to be smooth sailing for us because there will always be situations that will try to shake us up and even break us if it could;but then the beauty of life is that no matter what happens,we can always pull ourselves together,get over it(whatever it is) and keep on moving because one bad moment can’t stop us from living. However,it can be quite hard to get over a certain situation,especially when it hits you hard(trust me I’ve been there,and it sucks),so often time a lot of people find themselves brooding over the same situation for a long while,which gives rise to newer issues(yeah you definitely don’t want to be in that situation trust me).

Well I’ve had my own fair share of shitty situations that I’ve struggled with getting over for a while,a messy breakup being one of the most recent. Anyway, during the breakup, I tried everything I could to get over it(even had to search online for help),unfortunately some of the things I tried only made things worse for me….until I tried a few things that actually helped me out with the whole mess,steps which I wrote in my journal without ever thinking I’d share them. Well,without further ado,here are 15 tested and trusted steps to get over a bad situation(I wrote these with a messy breakup in mind though,but you can tweak them to suit whatever you’re going through);

1.) Admit to yourself that there is an ‘it’ you need to get over: This is basically the most essential step in this entire process. I mean how are you going to solve a problem if you won’t admit to yourself that it is a problem路? I’m just saying,you have to admit it to yourself because denying it just won’t work.

2.) Don’t downplay it and allow yourself to feel all the emotions in that very time frame: Holding back the emotions is quite dangerous in the sense that it can all blow up in your face one day,especially when you least expect it. So it’s best for you to just allow yourself to feel everything in that moment.

3.) Cry it all out: Yes I had to add this to my list because a lot of people underestimate crying,seeing it as a sign of weakness when it actually is a sign of strength,as well as a good way to release the emotions. Sometimes tears are actually the best therapy when it comes down to it.

4.)Get a confidant(e); As humans,we can’t really deal with everything by ourselves,neither can we bottle up every single emotion we feel( I do this a lot unfortunately,and it doesn’t work so I’m trying to work on it). This is what it’s important to get a confidant whom you feel comfortable opening up to. The confidant should be caring and compassionate with a great sense of empathy(and a good deal of common sense,very necessary).

5.) Keep A Journal: Ah yes,the good old journal;a great outlet for everything you’re feeling at the moment. I’d recommend keeping a journal because it’s a really nice way to let out emotions & a creative one at that(I kept journals a lot and I used to write my old ones like I was talking to someone. If you’re looking to start your own journal,then check out this post

6.) Try New Things: Put all that beautiful energy into something else;like a fun new hobby or any other activity that will help get your mind off things. It could be writing,gardening,singing, Tiktoking, hitting the gym, dancing, running (yes I said running); or whatever else you can think of.

7.) Avoid the blame game: DO NOT blame yourself for whatever went down unless it truly is your fault(then you need to work on it). Otherwise,do not blame yourself or think that there’s something wrong with you. Also; do not make the mistake of blaming anyone unless it’s really their fault;otherwise,keep away from the blame game.

8.) Clean Up: Delete memories,images or whatever of people or things that can remind you of the situation from your mind. This takes time so just try to breathe fine okay;and do not rush the deleting process as this can cause an override which will lead you to a mental breakdown(you don’t want that).

9.) Forgiveness Is Key: Forgive yourself and the other party so that you’ll be able to move on from the situation. Do not allow the hurt to turn you into a negative person;cause that’s a whole other load of trouble. After forgiveness,it’s best to just stay neutral to everything for a while.

10.) Key#2; Listen to music: Or even better,create a playlist of songs that help elevate your mood and get your mind off of things. It’s a well known face that music is quite therapeutic; so you can tap into this by creating a playlist of relatable songs which get you in a state of mind that actually lets you think things through rather than just feel it through.

11.) Love yourself: Take better care of yourself, do those things that you love doing and take out the time to enjoy yourself and live your life to the fullest. After all,you only live once and no one will love you better than you(Know that!)

12.) Space: Give yourself space;this cannot be over emphasized for any reason because it’s already a major part of the healing process. So give some space from the person(s) and things or places that remind you of the situation.

13.) Take your time: Do not rush the process for any reason whatsoever. You have to understand that it takes time(a good deal of time actually), and that by rushing it you’re only hurting yourself and making it worse which is SOOO not the goal. So take your time hun, breathe, grieve and heal.

14.) Don’t cry about it on social media: There are certain things you’re not really meant to talk about on social media;and this is one of them. I don’t think you want the whole world to know what you’re going through and attract a few judgmental people to your life. So kindly avoid “crying” on social media;if you must do it,do it sparingly and indirectly.

15.) Just live: In the end of it all,you have to realize that life goes on and that you can’t let one messy situation keep you back from living. Rather you move on by growing past it and tucking away the experience as a valuable lesson learned.

And if all else fails, then turn to God for help. Sometimes we have to realize that we can’t do it all by ourselves and need some divine guidance along the way;as well as remember that God will help us through it all if we put our faith in Him.

So yeah that’s it from me today, a 15- step guide(originally 22 steps but I had to cut out some which were too personal,after all it was gotten from my journal) on how to get over a bad situation. If you enjoyed this post and would like to receive updates on the next posts,then kindly subscribe to the blog and stay tuned,and if you know someone who needs it,then share it to them so that they can get to read it as well. Well I’m outta here,happy Sunday guys .

Yours’ truly, Arreta

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