relationships

7 Things A Toxic Relationship Can Do To You.

So what exactly can a toxic relationship do to you? We’ve all heard about how bad it is for your mental health and how it totally messes with the state of your emotions. However I don’t think I’ve actually seen anyone talk about the effects of it,other than that it can totally mess with your mental health and affect the way you relate with people,or that it can make you close your heart to love(it all depends really).

Now of course, apart from these well known effects there are a ton of others that are not really recognized or even if they are recognized;they aren’t really talked about. For some people,they could end up scared, broken and completely afraid of falling in love while for some others it could make them angry, bitter and hateful towards love (with good enough reason) and then there’s a third set of people(at least in what I’m familiar with) who are able to move past the pain and heal from all the trauma or are at least able to keep it under control (I’d say that I’m in this class but I’m still a work in progress if I’m to be honest because some of my coping methods aren’t really healthy).

So why am I talking about this today? Well I’m feeling quite open and in the mood to share some experiences of mine as well as a few that I’ve been able to come across from answering questions on Quora and some Facebook stories. I decided to share some of my own experiences(after all that was what I intended to do with both this blog and this series anyway).

7 Ways A Toxic Relationship Can Affect You.

1.) It messes with your social life: Apart from the fact that your toxic partner will be trying so hard to cut you off from your friends,a toxic relationship can affect your social life in so many other ways; a most noteworthy one is the way it makes begin to doubt yourself and the people around you; thus causing you to become withdrawn from people because you don’t know what to expect anymore and you’re afraid of meeting someone like your partner (or ex partner). Which just results in walls and shells for protection(in the metaphorical sense).

2.) It affects your financials: Especially if you’re either the very generous type or the easily manipulated type(I happen to be a mixture of both💔). What I’m trying to say here is that in a relationship where your toxic partner gets the added bonus of a willing ATM, then they’re going to be doing a lot of spending…with your own money. They’re basically going to leave most of their basic expenses for you to settle,maybe they’d start by borrowing some money and not paying back then they’d go on to flat out demanding for it which leaves you in a position where you have to cater for two people with your own funds(not cool,especially the other is a lying cheater who just uses you💔). This just makes you get real broke real quick and you’re left with an ungrateful lover who still abuses you. No no.

3.) It messes up your view of the world: Maybe like me,you were shielded from a lot of things out there while growing up so you believed that the world is a good place with good people(add rainbows and lollies if you’re totally like me 😂). But then you go out into the world,fall in love for the first time and have the unfortunate privilege of finding yourself in an abusive relationship that is so unhealthy for you. You’re stuck in there wondering why you had to go through this terrible situation and what happened to all the beautiful things you dreamed of. This slowly messes up the way you view the world in such a way that when you do get out of it,you’ll find yourself seeing the world as a cruel cold place with no bit of happiness. Yeah,it happens(hasn’t happened to me though😅).

4.) It leaves you with a void: Yup you read that right,toxic relationships are so emotionally draining that they have this way of leaving you with a big old void that hurts so much that you can’t ignore it. Ever had this feeling of emptiness that you just want to get rid of no matter what? Yeah that’s exactly how this is,and you know where it gets worse? How you choose to fill this void and dead with the feeling of emptiness. Well I won’t lie to you and say I filled mine right,no, I made the mistake of looking for a partner to fill the space, and what’s worse is that I was in such a rush(this is also due to the fact I’m a bit of an emotional dependent) that I messed things up more than once. Trust me,you don’t wanna do that, which is why I’ll advise you to try and fill the voice in a much better way,like learning more about yourself and actually healing.

5.) It can make you hate the opposite gender: Hello misogynists and man haters,this is actually aimed at a good number of you out there who are staunch haters of the other sex because of that one terrible relationship which you refuse to speak of that ruined your opinion of the other gender. Let’s say,a girl who finds herself in a relationship with a man who constantly hits her,criticizes her and makes her feel worthless is almost definitely going to find herself hating men because she might begin to believe that most if not all men are like that,the same thing happens to a guy when finds himself in a similar situation. Unfortunately I’m too busy getting crushes to hate guys so I didn’t land here😅😅.

6.) Relationship-induced depression: Of course with all that abuse,it’s almost impossible for you to escape falling into a depression of some sort. It might not be super serious in some cases while in other cases,you’re just two steps away from a suicide. In this situation,the things to consider are the length of time spent in the relationship and the type of abuse used by the toxic partner,this can determine how serious your depressive episode(s) might be. For example,if you’ve been dating your partner for a short while and all they do is lie and cheat then you’re bound to be getting constant mood swings(or should I say melancholy bouts🤔) whereas if you’ve been dating your toxic partner for years and they are fond of criticism you and making you feel worthless then you’re quite likely to fall into depression. I won’t lie I fell into a bit of a depression myself and trust me it is not pretty.

7.) Ooh ooh,trust issues(in Drake’s voice): And I don’t think this list would be complete without me mentioning this particular one because it is a major one. Like the main thing about toxic relationships is that your trust is constantly being broken by your partner who doesn’t really care so far as things are going the way they want it to. All those sweet words that don’t rhyme with their actions,those many promises that they make to you,promises to change and become better for you,only to be broken on a whim when they feel like that’s enough. You see that,yeah it can really mess you up,and what’s worse it’s going to leave you with major trust issues that will be so hard to get over because they’d make you believe that people are shifty creatures who cannot be trusted and until you are able to get over them,then you’ll be like that for a really long while.

And with that we bring to an end our list of the possible ways a toxic relationship can affect you,feel free to add others not previously listed in this post as well as share your own opinions on this post. Well that’s it for now,see you later loves….

Yours’ truly, Arreta🌺

8 Comments

  • Lenora

    Toxic relationship seems to be the order of the day
    It’s not that it hasn’t been there
    Times are changing… And so are the people
    Girls like you give others a supporting voice… To speak up
    Nice one Terra Dear

    • Benita

      Thank you love. It’s always been around but unfortunately,it’s been on an increase these days and to make it worse,most of the people in them don’t even know it’s bad for them. That’s why I’m running this mini series in particular

  • Rex

    There’s really a whole lot of toxicity everywhere both in relationships and friendships…. We all can always relate

    Thankyou 4 helping d girls to stay strong, live healthier and happier
    You’re d best TERRA!!!!!!!

    • Benita

      Why thank you . I try where I can,and I’m glad it’s paying off
      Honestly the number of toxic relationships popping up these days is so worrying and all,what’s even worse is that a lot of them don’t really know what it is. Which makes it harder for them to spot it until too late.

  • Dex

    There’s really a whole lot of toxicity everywhere both in relationships and friendships…. We all can always relate

    Thankyou 4 helping d girls to stay strong, live healthier and happier
    You’re d best TERRA!!!!!!!

    • Ezichi

      You hit the nail right at its head b…toxicity in relationships can be an entire wormhole of mental seige if fallen into…nicely done putting all these together kudos!

      • Benita

        Thank you dear,I just had to get this post out there so that people know just what kinda things a toxic relationship can do to them. I’m glad you enjoyed the post and that you got the message.

  • Dex

    There’s really a whole lot of toxicity everywhere both in relationships and friendships…. We all can always relate

    Thankyou 4 helping d girls to stay strong, live healthier and happier
    You’re d best TERRA!!!!!!!

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